pornstar123This question came up a few weeks ago when I was hanging out with one of my childhood friends in Bali. What began as a conversation about his ex-girlfriend turned into a conversation about jealousy. He’s a pretty jealous guy and a possessive boyfriend. I’m typically at the other end of the spectrum — not jealous to the point that many of the girls that I’ve dated have wished that I was.

We couldn’t see eye to eye. I perceived his jealousy to be nothing more than insecurity. He perceived my lack of jealousy as tolerance to being disrespected by my girlfriend. Now, my friend isn’t a mindless meat-head type. He’s somewhat conservative, but he’s very intelligent as well. He immediately began to throw interesting hypothetical situations at me: would I let my girlfriend hang out with her ex? Would I care if she got drunk and flirted with a guy? Would I care of she got drunk and kissed a guy? (No, no, and if I wasn’t there, then no.)

Then he asked me if I would ever date a porn star… and not just date her, but like a serious long-term relationship.

Now, despite being famous among my ex-girlfriends for my stoicism in the face of male competition, and despite writing at length about dealing with jealousy, this question sat uneasy with me.

I tried to poke a hole in the situation, but he immediately added, “This is a girl that you have amazing chemistry with and that you could see yourself falling in love with and from a purely personality point of view, possibly marrying. Except she’s a porn star. And she has been for years. Gang bangs, facials, anal, the whole nine yards. She’s probably banged 500 or even 1,000 guys. Would you date her? And I mean, seriously date her, like I-might-marry-this-girl-one-day date her?”

I was finally forced to give in. No, unless she switched to doing only girl-on-girl scenes, I wouldn’t be able to date her. And even with that condition, it still made me feel queezy — a true test of my values. I couldn’t ever marry a former porn star. Imagine your friends and even family members being able to Google their way to videos of your wife being banged by five big, muscley dudes? Ugh…

Even then, the relationship would be impossible. On the one hand, I probably wouldn’t feel completely comfortable unless she quit her job forever. On the other hand, if she truly loved her career and her work, that’s a guaranteed way to kill the relationship instantly. I guess there’s a reason that porn stars always date other people in the porn industry.

So what would you do? Would you date her? Let me break down the question further:

  • Would you date a porn star?
  • If not, would you date her if she agreed to only do girl-on-girl scenes?
  • If not, would you date her if she agreed to quit her job for you?
  • If not, would you at least sleep with a porn star?
  • If not, are you sure you’re heterosexual?

Remember, this is all assuming that she has an amazing personality and that you two have the best chemistry together of any girl you’ve met in your life. So… what’s your answer?

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46 Responses to Would You Date a Porn Star?

  1. Paul says:

    I would not date a porn star, not even if she agreed to only do girl-on-girl scenes…not even if she agreed to quit her job, because she likely carries a lot of emotional baggage. Under the right conditions though, I would sleep with a porn star, but I would hope she doesn’t go all video-vixen on me and act the part in bed. I’d want to feel her humanity (with a condom on).

  2. Leo says:

    “If not, would you date her if she agreed to quit her job for you?”
    Yeah, whatever she did in the past is her business. Our relationship start in a clean slate. Easier said than done but THEORYCALLY speaking, I’d do it.
    -Would you married/date an ex-prostitute?
    -Would you married/date a trasgender?

  3. Mark says:

    Paul brings up a really good point about emotional baggage… but assuming that’s a non-issue, just for the sake of addressing any prejudices, here’s my answers to Leo’s questions…

    For some reason the ex-prostitute bothers me less than the porn star when it comes to a serious relationship for a few reasons:

    1. Her sexual record isn’t easily accessible and permanent for the whole world to see… including friends, family, and future children.
    2. She most likely was pushed to prostitution by circumstance and need, not some sort of obsession of sex and attention.
    3. All in all, I imagine the average high end prostitute bangs fewer guys than the average porn star and probably has far more repeat customers. My guess is a 25-year old pro would have fewer than 200 notches, whereas a 25-year old porn star would easily have 1,000+.

    This all assuming she was STD-free of course.

    As for the trans-gender… wow… as much as I believe in equal rights for LGBT, and free love and yada, yada… I don’t think I could. It’d just weird me out. I guess that’s another of my limits.

    I’ve read that sex change surgeries are so advanced now that some men are marrying women that they don’t realize weren’t born women… so I guess what you don’t know can’t hurt you.

  4. Peter Phoenix says:

    I would sleep with Tori Black. But it might be like throwing a sausage down a hallway.

  5. David says:

    Hi Mark I think it’s great that you’re honest about where you are. Some of your counterparts in the industry might just SAY one thing here but not necessarily believe it deep down.

    But here’s another question:

    Aren’t there girls out there saying “would ever you date a PUA?”?

    I know from the feedback I’ve heard here, that some girls might fancy a PUA or dating coach in the short term, but when I see them with their boyfriend, he’s someone we’d call ‘normal’. What I mean is that there are, who knows, lots of PUAs out there who get some attraction from a girl but she may not want to introduce him to her social circle (btw I’m referring to the all-peacocked PUA full of routines, etc).

    As for the question, I guess I’d try it first. Cos for me it sounds pretty exotic to be with such a woman BUT I’d be very concerned about STDs for sure.

    I’d assume she wouldn’t be able to commit, so I hope I’d be able to programme my mind to accept that this would only be for the short term…

  6. Asian Rake David says:

    Hey,

    This question came up in the latest series of Entourage.

    I guess as players and PUAs pride themselves on being open-minded and all that. But from an evolutionary psychology perspective, it makes complete sense why this should sit uncomfortably with a man.

    Best,
    Asian Rake David

  7. Tim says:

    Assuming she has an amazing personality and the best chemistry I’ve ever had with any girl…

    Would you date a porn star? Yes. I’d at least go on a date or two to see how I feel when I spend some real time with her. This doesn’t necessarily mean we sleep together, yet. As for a relationship, I can honestly say I don’t know until the situation comes along.

    If not, would you date her if she agreed to only do girl-on-girl scenes? There’s definitely a difference between her doing porn with guys or girls, but I don’t think it’d be a dealbreaker or maker in this scenario.

    If not, would you date her if she agreed to quit her job for you?

    This really only applies if I could get over her past as well. But it would definitely be a defining factor. I very much doubt I could date her if she didn’t.

    If not, would you at least sleep with a porn star? If we had an amazing connection, and apart from the ethics of selling sex for money we shared a lot of values that are important to me, than probably. I don’t know for sure though, I might be unable to get the idea of her with all those other (well-endowed and highly talented) guys out of my head while we did it and just not be able to.

    If not, are you sure you’re heterosexual?

    Haha yes I’m sure. The 17 yr old me who spent the last 5 years of his life in a desert of sexual ambiguity can give you a definitive answer on that one.

  8. anonymous says:

    I don’t know how believable these things are, but this guy sounds pretty sincere:

    http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/ed0cd/iama_guy_whos_dating_a_porn_star_ama/

  9. Steve Piccus says:

    Dear Entropy,

    The fact that you feel better about taking a prostitute rather than a pornstar reveals how emotionally scarred you are…is it possible you that santa claus came down your chimney as a child?

    RELEASE THE PAIN! SssssHHHHhhhhRRRRRUUUUBBBBBBBBBB!

  10. Neville longbottom says:

    Date a pornstar…sure I guess just for a short term fling and bragging rights, marry them….HELL NO!

    When a guy working at mcdonalds comes up he smells like hamburgers, what will the pornstar wife come home smelling like :S

    Also its her job to get fucked and be a cum dumpster, I’d rather take a girl with more self respect thank you very much

    • David says:

      Neville, this is the point I was making above. It seems ok for the PUA community to be ‘cum dispensers’ and get bragging rights by nailing models, porn stars, dancers etc BUT – if you are that girl then you’re a slut, or a ‘cum dumpster’ as you say above. Charming.

      I hope girls in porn, the sex industry, modelling, will have the self-respect to choose a man who respects her sexuality.

      Bit of madonna-whore complex at play here..

      • Mark says:

        I actually plan on writing an article on this at some point, “Does PUA ruin you for long-term monogamy?” I’ve had a couple veteran PUA guys who have left the scene for long-term relationships talk to me about this and I’ve struggled with this as well.

        It’s less about just having sex with 50 or 100 women as much as it is the way it alters your mindset and your expectations from women and the world.

      • Neville longbottom says:

        I make the distinction, a girl who has a varied sex life, okay thats fine, a girl who gets paid to go on camera and get fucked stupid for money, NO! that is not okay. I would never be a male pornstar (even though I got the equipment)because thats a shady disgusting degrading job to have. A profession is a big part of one’s life and says a lot about you, if you choose to have a profession where you fuck for money…well thats just fucked up.

        Again, I wouldn’t want my wife coming home smelling like cum after a hard days work. Self respect goes a long way.

  11. truth says:

    There are some hypothetical situations going on here that just don’t exist in the real world. It’s like being asked to take Ron Paul/Ayn Rand style libertarianism seriously. Those guys already crashed our entire economic system and you want me to let you try again?

    I live in Hollywood and know porn stars. There are almost no women who work as porn stars who don’t have emotional baggage.

    throwaway4porn [S] 36 points37 points38 points 4 days ago[-]

    Porn stars are FUCKING CRAZY (my gf excluded).

    throwaway4porn [S] 71 points72 points73 points 4 days ago[-]

    No. A LOT of porn actresses use hard drugs.

    Even if they literally were just between a rock and a hard place and couldn’t find a position as a hostess or some other job that paid them for their looks without requiring sex, after a few weeks of doing that work she will almost certainly have baggage. Most porn stars also work as prostitutes on the side, far more than the number of strippers who will do ‘extras’. You’ll have sex with more people as a prostitute than as a porn star.

    Looking at Sasha Grey’s body language, she looks a lot less ‘hard’ and ‘closed off’ now that she’s married and has mainstream acceptance than when she first started doing porn. My guess is that a lot of the emotional damage comes from the social stigma of doing porn. At the end of the day I would guess that making casual sex your job has to have an emotional impact just like making anything else you like your job… how damaging it really is… we’ll find out in the next few decades as porn continues to go further mainstream.

    • Mark says:

      Of course everyone has baggage. And of course porn stars probably have more of it than most.

      The situation is designed hypothetically to force the reader to address any prejudice or insecurity he has about women and their promiscuity, not to realistically question whether we’d date porn star X or Y or whomever. Although you raise some interesting ideas. I wouldn’t mind reading Jenna Jameson or Traci Lords’s biographies sometimes. From what I’ve heard, the industry is a pretty screwed up place.

  12. truth says:

    So asking me if I’d date a porn star… if everything throwaway4porn said in his posts were true, sure I would. From his own posts that’s almost never the case…. and I’d be skeptical that his relationship is everything he says it is. Skeptical means to be open to what ever conclusion the facts lead you to, but to look at things carefully with a critical mind. It’s possible just highly unlikely still means it’s possible… there are anomalies everywhere like Siamese twins, albinos, etc. Until I saw otherwise I’d guess that a woman able to do porn without getting screwed up emotionally beyond the point of having a decent relationship would be a similar anomally. Like I wrote, we’ll know in a few decades.

  13. truth says:

    Jenna Jameson wrote in her biography that she denied to Howard Stern that she’d ever been raped… but in reality she was brutally raped twice. Traci Lords was also sexually molested. So in factoring in people’s answers you also have to factor in their denial.

  14. Madamada says:

    I guess the real problem with dating a pornstar would really be : “would you accept to cure a notably mostly screwed up girl with background emotional issue and make efforts to preserve a normal life while preparing yourself to deal with any uncomfortable situation she will throw in your couple without being screwed up yourself ?”.

    Truth has, in my advice sum up the problem.

    Are you ok when she’s telling she’s only going to see a “friend” and still sleep well (who is the friend ?) ?

    What do you feel when she tells you she’s to disappear “because she has to work” (you trust her of course) ?

    What does she mean when she tells you she “loves” you (while you know she probably said this so many times she lost the feeling with the word itself ?) ?

    I guess that unless you’re working in the industry, and understanding the process most of the girls go through, (aka living in their world, and understanding the level of a “daily life reality” pornstar go through) personnality and chemistry won’t change much a thing on long term. There’s too much difference (I’m not being fatalist there), not to mention “cultural gap” in this situation to be able to say “yes, it won’t matter to me as long as we have something in common”. Cause, it will be the only leverage you have, and once the emotional connection is gone, what’s left ?

    Of course, there are some “notable exception” like the recent Sasha Grey / Jesse Jane or Belladonna being married and having kids (mostly with guys from the porn circuit). But frankly, the answer will ultimately depends on what you’re looking in a girl you want to be with to make a real decision.

  15. Madamada says:

    For the curious, Jameson mentionned in her book the description the typical guy pornstar, who’s the average douchebag you love to hate, who carries all her luggage, makes her feel like a princess (buying stuffs, granting her wish to come true, even unreasonnable ones), but, who’s in reality acting more like a manager/pimp, and ultimately, being some sort of abusing Don King who throw her out once he finds another younger, and better replacement.

    On the other and, the pornstar fufill her values of being protected, loved and cared by a bad boy. Well until she realizes the truth.

    This is of course told in a funny and fictionnal way (I don’t take it granted), but fiction is often more realistic than the reality itself sometimes I guess.

  16. Gully says:

    I would find being with a pornstar hard to be honest. Even if I wanted to get with a girl, but I knew she had slept with a few of my friends for example, or I knew she had slept with loads of people and had a reputation, I think even that would put me off slightly. Thats just where I am. I’m all for experience, but a girl with a big sex history can put me off, probably partly because I’ve only had modest experience.

    That said, you can meet someone and really like them. I wont go into too much detail – but I met a girl with a slight physical impairment – and I really liked her. Obviously prior to meeting her I would have been like no way. Its the same with a pornstar. You could meet one that you clicked with and wanted to be with, despite all the faults of her.

    In terms of a good relationship anyway, isnt a big part of that taking onboard their faults as they are instead of being judgemental?

  17. Luis says:

    This post reminds me a lot of a book called “The Book of Questions: Love and Sex”! I recomend a peek on it.

  18. anonymous says:

    “It’s like being asked to take Ron Paul/Ayn Rand style libertarianism seriously. Those guys already crashed our entire economic system and you want me to let you try again?”

    Huh??? Ron Paul and Ayn Rand together? What? How exactly did Ron Paul ever get enough power to have any effect on our economic system? I wish. If only.

  19. No. Too much baggage and life is too short to deal with it.

  20. Brett says:

    Here’s a half-baked comment since I no longer have time to think about anything for more than 20 seconds other than infecting organisms…buuuuuutttttt, Mark…it seems like you’re more concerned with what other people would think about you dating a porn star, than the actual jealousy from her fuckin other dudes

  21. modernguy says:

    If you’re not jealous you have the emotional depth of a rock.

  22. Nick says:

    * Would you date a porn star?

    Logically, no i wouldn’t date a porn star for a long term commitment. But i would be happy to be good friends with her or something non serious.

    * If not, would you date her if she agreed to only do girl-on-girl scenes?

    I don’t think i would to be honest.

    * If not, would you date her if she agreed to quit her job for you?

    Right now i would still say no, but you never know its easier to say without actually being in the situation.

    * If not, would you at least sleep with a porn star?

    Yes i would, without much hesitation besides having no protection

    * If not, are you sure you’re heterosexual?

  23. Jimmy says:

    Honestly, I think PUA has led me to think a certain way and have mindsets that I wouldn’t have otherwise. Then again, I think to a high degree, that it only reinforced and strengthened what I had already believed, and maybe take it the further end or extreme of the spectrum.

  24. Cassie says:

    Ok, I’m not a guy… so maybe I shouldn’t be posting here. However, I feel like adding my two cents as most women do. That and I think I have a completely different outlook than other women and this may or may not be a positive… we’ll see.

    Would you date a porn star?

    Yes I would date a porn star. As long as he is actually what I am looking for in a person, and I am genuinely attracted to his personality and appearance (because there are some gross porn stars out there), I would date him.

    If not, would you date her if she agreed to only do girl-on-girl scenes?

    NO I WOULD NEVER WANT HIM TO DO SCENES WITH ANOTHER GUY.

    If not, would you date her if she agreed to quit her job for you?

    I would never want him to quit his job for me. If he wants to quit he should do it because HE wants to.

    If not, would you at least sleep with a porn star?

    As of right now I can only think of one porn star I would sleep with (Keni Styles) as I’m not really attracted to any other ones… that I know of.

    If not, are you sure you’re heterosexual?

    Definately a sane heterosexual woman, who loves sex and wants someone who enjoys it just as much as she does… and is just as good as her (being the key component).

    In any case, it’s just a job. They go to work, do their job, and then come home. I’m going to be a surgeon. I have no problem cutting people open for a living… personally, I think mentally that is worse than wanting to pleasure people for a living. Just a personal opinion. Love!

  25. Brian says:

    Would i fuck a pornstar? Sure. Would i date them seriously and one day make one a wife? Fuck no. I’ve talk to plenty of pornstar and most of them have mental issues. Plus, one of the key requirement for any girl to become my serious gf and that is class. A pornstar with class? haha, what a fucking oxymoron. That’s like saying a buddhist monk serial killer.

  26. Dawson says:

    I’d love to say yes to dating a pornstar but c’mon, lets be realistic for a second. Would you feel comfortable with this:

    -Hey you, had a good day at work?
    -it was alright, I managed to catch up on some paper work which was good. What about you, what did you do today honey?
    -oh, I sucked some guys dick whilst I got fucked in the ass . . .

    But as for a one night stand or fuck buddy
    I’d say the same thing a man with two penises would say to his tailor when asked if he dresses to the right or left.YES.
    (god bless lucky number slevin)

  27. Marcell says:

    Of course I will get married with her

    You should be mature enough in order to understand that making films is just acting, nothing more nothing less.
    One thing is making love and another is having sex. Why to drop an opportunity to share your life with someone that complete you because she is a pornstar.
    If there are love in that relationship, doing porn is not a problem.
    My big concern is, If my wife is a pornstar, she should take care, and avoid to catch some diseases, so I will recommend her safe sex, or an extensive lab analysis.

    Good luck!

  28. Dave says:

    Okay, I have briefly been dating a porn actress. Not really a star, and she had limited to moderate work fro 5 years which mostly ended in the last 2 years. She is west coast and I am east coast and the relationship is mainly casual at this point. Does it bother me? Yes. I do see a difference in whether she is still in the business or it is in the past. I am still not entirely sure that she doesn’t “work” a little bit here and there. To me, even if it is all in the past, the biggest problem is that the internet is forever. I know that at anytime I can search her stage name and see vids and pics or her with all kind of studs. I do not know if I can get beyond that and that is why, for now, things are still casual and long distance. We text and talk with increasing frequency, and part of me does not want to become too close. Ideally, right now I want to be is a friend with benefits. Trying to maintain this status and keep my feelings in check are the hard parts. And whether to discuss any of this with her is not clear to me. You know, I wonder if these girls think about the difficulty that their brief careers may bring into their relationships even years later.

  29. Kendrick says:

    I have a similar situation to Dave. I am currently dating a former porn star. When I met her she was to to the point that she wanted to leave the business and pursue different career opportunities. I quickly learned that those involved in porn are a lot more brains than we give them credit. I can’t say that I agree with the lifestyle, but I didn’t know she was a porn star when I met her and she and I share a lot of the same common interests. If you take everything away all the materialistic things from a person, would you still like that person? Think about it.

  30. Phil says:

    never will date one unless it involved sex later, i can never see a pornstar has girlfriend/wife material, i’d think about all those guys doing her each time we make love and i would never want one of my buds say hey phil i just fapped to your wife on gangbang palooza

  31. edwardasantie says:

    yes i will date a pron star that is because a pron star is very beautiful and sexy .i like watching pron movie and i think i will like to date a pron star they are sexy and romantic if there is a pron star who won,t a husband should call my number 0279450812 and i will love that pron lady to the end of my life thank you from edwardasantie

  32. Jorges says:

    Yes, I’d definitely date a porn star and the fact that she is porn star would even make her more attractive for.. yes long-term relationships! Because it would show an ease and openness towards sexuality that I’d appreciate at a woman.

    But on the other hand, I don’t know anybody from the business personally so I can just assume.

    (Only if the porn she was doing involved some sexual practices that repel me, I would have a problem. But this also applies if there would be no camera involved, so it’s not about the question discussed here.)

    Still, reading the other answers surprised me and made me laugh even a bit. Because I tried to imagine the question

    “Would you date a PUA?”

    on a women’s forum. And I guess, many of the answers here could be found there.

    “These guys are full of emotional baggage. I mean, they *learn* pick-up lines!”

    “They have been banging hundreds of women. They never can be faithful.”

    “The internet never forgets. I don’t want my family and my kids read about my boyfriends/husbands bragging in that PUA forum about how many girls he banged month in a month.”

    “These guys lie to girls to get girls into bed.”

    You might say “this is not PU / not me” to some of these things – but these cliches you can easily get reading PU forums, “The Game” or watching that VH-1 show. Surely a superficial picture. Like maybe… our picture of the porn industry.

    I mean, what is it that makes so many of you feeling uncomfortable with dating a porn star? That they’ve banged hundreds of guys? Like you would mind hitting three digits yourself? That they’ve banged random guys? Like you’ve never banged a fat girl? That her past is visually archived? Well, doesn’t that smell a bit like hipocrisy? “It’s ok what you did, as long as it’s hidden and my family can’t see it.”

    Thanks Mark, I really like the question of that article because it reveals a lot of hidden feelings we have about sex. And it’s funny that the only answer I can fully subscribe to came from a women (Cassie). :)

  33. Ed says:

    Yes to all questions. She’s a porn star? Sign me up. Have any of you watched porn lately? I’d take all the baggage, who cares, think about the great sex you’ll be haveing. You don’t even have to tell here what to do, she’s a porn star. I don’t know, its a no brainer for me. Oh and think about the money she makes. Increadable sex, lots of money
    isn’t this what women traditionally look for. And think about this, the next time you date a girl who gives you mind blowing sex and can suck the chrome off a trailor hitch,,,,,,,,,How do you think she got to be that good. At least you know what your getting with a porn star…

  34. FEELING.LOST says:

    Ok, I am at a cross roads.I am dating a former porn star and it’s driving me insane. He told me about doing porn the very first day we met,but I didn’t care as much. Now we have been together 4 months,and after watching 6 vids(mostly done with a platonic friend of his), suddenly I feel hurt and disgusted. I fell in love and now I suddenly care. This is hard. I want to erase the videos because I don’t want my friends or family to see them,and I am so nervous someone will see him and recognize him. I am in a place where I agree with a lot of opinions on here. I feel bad for feeling disgusted and I do love him. I just can’t imagine why people would have sex for money on camera. I am conservative,I realize,and that drives my opinions undoubtedly. I want this to work,but I am having trouble moving past this. I need some help guys.I appreciate those of you who spoke on love and looking past it, but also the comments about “internet being forever” are true too. Why put that out there and then hope for a normal life. Why drag me into your love, climb into my heart, all the while knowing you body is exploited way beyond what you told me?? I am angry and confused and totally in love.

    Help

    • Mark says:

      If you love him, then you need to accept ALL of him, even the parts of him you don’t like. And part of accepting all of who he is, is not being ashamed of who he is. You don’t have to like it, but you do have to accept it and let him know that it’s OK.

      Obviously this isn’t easy… but as you go through this process it’s important that you don’t blame him for who he used to be. The minute you start doing that is the beginning of the end.

  35. R.Sole says:

    Lots of naive BS here. Let’s deal with real facts:

    1. It’s ‘porn actress’, not ‘porn star’. A porn star is a super famous one, there’s only about half a dozen of those in the world. Your regular performer is a porn ACTRESS not a star.
    2. Almost all performers whore on the side. If you fuck for $ on camera, of course you will fuck for $ off camera, especially since a regular job is hard to get now – most places fire you if they find out you’re in porn.
    3. Doing porn OR whoring means you fuck 500-1000 people per year MINIMUM. Whoring = 3-5 days a week, minimum 3 customers daily, so minimum 10 and more like 20 per week. That’s 500-1000 at the least.
    4. Many STDs can’t be cured or prevented by using condoms. Almost all whores or porn performers will have genital herpes which is incurable and transmissible even with condoms. You WILL catch it if you fuck them regularly, even protected.
    5. If you want kids, you have to fuck her bareback. STD tests only work in hindsight, she can catch HIV or other diseases in the time between one test and another, then give it to you and your kid(s).
    6. Unless you’re one of those swinger or cuckold fetish guys, you will get jealous.
    7. It will make you a laughing stock with many of your friends, and definitely cause you problems at work, and socially. If she is retired this is a bit less troublesome, but still a problem. Feel ok that some of your friends, your colleagues, family will watch her getting DPed, bukkake-d, double anal, peed on and then beat off to it? If you break up, what will future girlfriends or future wife think?
    8. Even if you handle all this and don’t mind catching the clap, what about if you have kids in future? Imagine them at school when another kid finds out, then brings in vids of her getting gang banged and treated like a whore on film, and everyone at school sees it. How will your kids feel, knowing this is their mother?

    It doesn’t matter how liberal you are. There are real factual downsides to dating a porn performer, that open-mindedness cannot change. Wake up and smell the coffee.

    • Sonic says:

      You got all the critical considerations, but I dont think you write in the way that without discrimination.

      Jenna Jameson is the example who now facing point 8. Her stories can be reference for discussion here.

  36. HubieG says:

    I looked for this thread because I am, in fact, dating an ex-porn star. Well, maybe not star so much but “actress”. She hasnt actually “told” me yet, although she has left plenty of clues for me to follow. With Google that was easy. I dont believe it was a particularly long career and as far as I can tell (not having actually bought and watched any of the movies) it was pretty benign…just regular sex. But its suddenly not a theoretical question for me. She is a very smart, driven, successful women with a second career. Why she didnt change her name is a bit of a question for me, but maybe she is not embarrassed. We had already had sex before I looked her up and was sure about it so there was no way to make a decision before that happened. I thought about it a lot afterwards and I have decided that I dont really care what she did. How far this goes is another matter…I have kids and they could easily look her up. How do I feel about that? But for now I like to be with her, and she with me. She is great in and out of bed and although I thought might be performance anxiety issues I dont seem to have that problem.

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