Another video today, this one on dealing with insecurities, negative emotions and some talk about the infamous America article. Next week we’ll return to the usual 2-3 articles per week.
If you’d like me to answer a question on video, feel free to post it in the comments below. Enjoy.
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Are You Frustrated By Women?
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This video was very real and authentic, and I enjoyed it a lot.
I think with these videos, I am starting to get the hang of what you mean with vulnerability.
Cool. That’s good to hear.
Geoff Thompson is a British martial artist and former bouncer who wrote excellent books and autobiographies about how to handle fear. Highly recommended reading.
Good video. Valuable insights, thanks.
Yeah, I liked this one too.
Just wonder, instead of Mark looking into the camera under the gaze of the sky, it could be good to see a ‘tonight show’ or couch scene (ie shot inside) instead when the other guys ask him questions and also contribute..
We are considering some different locations for the next batch of videos. The lighting situation really wasn’t that awesome this time around… First try right? Thanks for the feedback David.
Yeah, dude. Just avoid filming when the light source (e.g., sun) is directly overhead the subject (Mark). It creates really dark shadows on the face, especially in the eye areas. Plus, it makes the subject (Mark) squint. Try later in the afternoon, or early in the morning when the sun is softer and closer to the horizon.
Good first try, though.
For someone who can be a raging asshole, you seem like a really chill guy.
That was a masterful backhanded compliment
Hey Tim, you’re interning at PM right? Have you personally seen his angry side or is he always this chill? Does he unleash bouts of rage at home when everyone else is out getting groceries? I have a hard time believing he has difficulty dealing with anger. Maybe he’s hiding it, I don’t know.
You should see him when we drink his Coke Zero.
My anger comes out more as moodiness… I get really cranky and dismissive at times (at least it feels that way to me). I can be extremely condescending as well.
It almost never comes out in outbursts. I could count my violent outbursts on one hand. That’s kind of what I was getting at in the video… it comes out in a lot of passive-aggressive ways because I never was good at airing it out legitimately.
But of course this is self-perception, these guys may tell you something completely different.
I believe his defence mechanism is to go into the bathroom and masturbate furiously. Just a hunch I have.
In all seriousness, Mark pretty much pointed out what he’s like. Obviously the guy gets angry, it’s just he doesn’t express it through yelling or being verbally abusive. Which is good, because I don’t think any of us would deal with that very well.
As he also said, instead it comes out through being condescending or becoming moody. Honestly though, even if it can sometimes be hurtful or insulting, I think that’s a much better expression of it.
It’s interesting to me, because I’m similar in that I’m very passive-aggressive with my anger, but I don’t express it through moodiness or being condescending. Instead I either just stew in it until it dissipates, or otherwise it builds to a boiling point where I absolutely explode, and do or say something really hurtful. I’ve done some things I regret when I get like that. Luckily that’s rare. I think it has happened once or twice with these guys, but nothing really ever came of it.
Cool, I tend to stew in my own anger as well. The only times I ever explode are when the two parrots at my house screech continuously.
Most of the time I just tend to get in a bad funk that leaks into my perspective on things.
I think meditation might help me handle my emotions better. I tend to get hysterical when I’m frazzled.
I know you’re joking and that this sounds rediculous but masturbating furiously is INDEED considered a defense mechanism. It is a contradictory response for fear.
No need to thank me for enriching your life with deep knowledge
Great video, Mark! Keep it up! And stay away from filming when the light source is directly above your head — it creates those shadows in your eyes which somewhat appear to be blackeyes. XD
Nonetheless, the message is great!
I remember when I did the Landmark forum and found out about rackets. I became aware that it was possible to control your emotions. Unfortunately I also internalized that it was “bad” or “wrong” to get angry (although this was never said or implied).
I remember when I was doing a self-improvement event in LA, I was with some guys for a few days and they had never seen me angry (although they had noticed I had some passive-aggressive inauthentic nice guy tendencies) the van we were driving in was undercut by an SUV and I exploded and started racially abusing the van driver.
Everyone went crazy. They thought it was awesome I had finally expressed my rage. Ever since then I’ve been a lot more expressive about feeling pain, hurt and anger. I’m far from perfect even today (like this morning when my elderly next door neighbour implied that I should weed my garden because the plants were interfering with his fence when THERE ARE THREE FENCES IN MY GARDEN OVERRIDEN WITH POISON FUCKING IVY FROM HIS SIDE!!! and I didn’t call him out on it)…….
but anyway its better to express it if you can
It’s good to see you in videos as you come across as quite chilled out but with a dry, almost cranky undertone which is me all over. Don’t worry, it’s a good thing. You come across far more natural than the vast majority of bloggers and supposed ‘gurus’ that often jump at the chance to go in front of a camera.
There are far too many fake people in this area. So you’re a welcome change. Keep it up.
You look so different from how I imagined you based on that little photo on the forum!
These videos are a good idea. I suggest you make some with regard to women and dating.