I want to thank everyone who took the time to answer the survey earlier this week. Many of the results were unsurprising. Others were reaffirming. Others were enlightening. Now that it’s over, here’s a fun (long) post running down who the readers of this site are, what you guys like and what you’re looking for. Below are some of the more interesting and surprising statistics. Further down, I analyze the written responses and as we’ll see there are actually some surprising results.
Who You Are
- 98% men. Still a sausage-fest.
- 64% of readers are in their 20’s. 20% are in their 30’s. This is a much higher proportion of 20- and 30-something’s than the Practical Pick Up survey I did last Spring (it was 54% and 16% respectively, then). It seems that the age of the readership is narrowing around my own age (I’m 27 now).
- 65.2% of readers say they are satisfied with their life. 13.7% say they’re very satisfied. 24.7% of PM readers are very satisfied with their job situation.
- 67.9% of readers are very interested in world travel, 48.9% are very interested in changing careers or starting a business, and 81.3% are very interested in developing more emotional awareness in their lives (more on this tomorrow).
- 28.1% consider themselves part of the PUA community, while 43.5% say they’d be comfortable sharing articles on Facebook and Twitter. The two most common responses given by people not comfortable sharing on social media were, “I don’t want people to know I’m reading pick up content,” and “I don’t use Facebook/Twitter.” Fair enough.
- For every person who signed up for the Approach Women Program, 2.5 people said they “Will Sign Up, But Not Now.” This explains the somewhat-disappointing sales numbers from the other week. Ironically, it seems a LOT of people have some approach anxiety about signing up to a program which conquers their approach anxiety.
Some more interesting results when answers are cross-referenced against one another:
- Readers ages 29 and under are, on average, more interested in traveling, less active in PUA, more likely to have bought Models, and more likely to buy products in the future.
- Readers ages 30 and older are, on average, more focused on solely women and dating, more satisfied with their careers, less satisfied with their lives overall, and strangely, less interested in buying my products.
- Of the readers who said they are “dissatisfied” with their current life situation, 98% of them are interested in improving their emotional awareness. At least these guys know what they need to focus on!
- Readers who put “dissatisfied” for their life situation are less likely to be active in PUA, are primarily only interested in content on dating and confidence, are far less likely to share articles on Facebook and Twitter (I don’t think this is a coincidence), and are more interested in future products.
- And finally, long time readers (of a year or more), are on average much more interested in reading about travel, much less interested in reading about fitness/health, and are very likely to have bought Models (makes sense).
Your Written Responses
Between the two optional open-ended questions, over 500 written responses were submitted — many of them at least a paragraph long. I read all of them, and many of them twice. One by one, I grouped the similar responses into individual categories to get a sense for some over-arching patterns in the readership. Many of the responses were one-off opinions, but the vast majority of them fell into one of the same few themes.
Question: “What’s the biggest problem you face in your life today as a man?”
1. Taking Action / Making the First Move / Being Assertive / Overcoming My Anxiety / Being Fearless – 15% of all responses – I’m mildly surprised but also pleased this answer came out on top. It’s something that I really identify with as the root cause of a lot of problems and I’m pretty passionate about it myself. I also feel like it’s something I’m able to address well and would like to reorient PostMasculine more towards this theme in general (more on that tomorrow).
2. Career Advancement / Making Money / Financial Independence / Starting a Business – 14% of all responses – This one DID surprise me. Not only did this one beat out “Women and Dating” as a priority, but it killed it. I’ve noticed for many years a strong correlation not only between a man’s professional/financial independence and his happiness, but also his emotional capacity to connect with women. I didn’t have to coach for long to notice that clients I had who were broke, lived with their parents, or were unemployed, always did far worse with women than the guys who had jobs and careers they enjoyed. I guess what surprised me was the severity of this. In the survey, only about 20% of people put “very unsatisfied” for their job satisfaction, yet it seems that when people are unsatisfied in this department, they’re REALLY unsatisfied.
3. Low Self-Esteem / Low Confidence / High Neediness / Accepting Myself / Self Awareness – 14% of all responses – No surprise here. Intimately related with the first category, but also different. I got a LOT of requests for more writing on self-esteem, self-awareness and confidence. I’ll admit, I’ve been shirking them a bit because they’re such massive topics. I also plan on doing a large product on them (again, more on that tomorrow).
4. Become a Man / Discover My Masculinity / Stop Being Ashamed of Being a Man – 11% of all responses – The whole “become a man” thing is very vague and probably means many different things to different men. But I did find it interesting that this language came up repeatedly. I imagine that this is tied a lot to sexual anxiety and sexual shame.
5. Stop People-Pleasing / Stand Up For Myself / Express Myself Honestly / Be More Open – 8% of all responses – I have an entire chapter dedicated to this in Models. It’s incredibly important, not only for emotional health and self-esteem, but also for ultimately being attractive to women… which finally brings us to…
6. Being Better With Women / Having Better Relationships With Women / Getting a Girlfriend – 8% of all responses – The biggest surprise of all… that a site that was solely dedicated to dating advice for four years, that is still predominantly dominated by dating content today, and where 93% of the readership reports being interested in content on women and dating — it was the sixth most common answer to “What’s the biggest problem in your life right now?” If anything, this really validated my belief that the whole pick up thing really is self-help in disguise (just look at categories 1 thru 3), and that getting better with women, for most of us, is used as motivation to enact change in our life, rather than be the most important change itself. I think it also shows that what we want isn’t always necessarily what we need the most, and vice-versa.
7. Finding My Passion or Purpose in the World – 7% of all responses – Number of men here without a real sense of direction right now. Very important.
8. Having Better Relationships With Everyone / Better Lifestyle / Better Social Circle or More Friends – 6% of all responses – The general lifestyle answer. For what it’s worth, I think similar to the Career/Job problem, guys who struggle in this department should take care of this BEFORE going out and trying to be some super player pimp… not as part of it, and not after it. Before it.
9. Life Balance / Time Management / Discipline – 6% of all responses – A large percentage of those who put this answer were either doctors or medical students… coincidence? I think not.
Question: “What is the biggest challenge for men today in general?”
1. Defining Masculinity / Transcending Our Gender Role – 19% of all responses – I shouldn’t have to say much more on this.
2. Women/Feminists Shaming and Controlling Men / General Emasculation of Society – 18% of all responses – I was a little disturbed by the venom and paranoia of a few of these answers, but in general, yes, whether you want to blame it on globalization, the information economy, feminist policies, political-correct culture, or whatever, the traditional role of men is disappearing from western society.
3. Find Meaning in Their Lives – 12% of all responses – Interesting that more people put this as an answer to men overall than themselves personally.
4. Apathy and Lack of Passion/Ambition/Awareness – 12% of all responses – This has been covered a lot recently by sociologists and referred to as “Guy Culture,” basically the idea that men in their 20’s these days are usually doing everything they can to prolong their adolescence and avoid all responsibilities and commitments as much as possible.
5. Shitty Economy / Shitty Education / Society Changing Too Fast / Too Many Distractions – 11% of all responses – Particularly enjoyed a couple of the crazed and angry political rants from some readers on this one.
6. Lack of Confidence / Too Much Neediness / Growing A Pair / Opening Up – 11% of all responses – Can’t help but feel that this is probably a bit of a projection by some guys with their own issues. I think both genders are having these problems right now.
7. Unavailable or Poor Male Role Models / Poor Media Portrayals of Men – 7% of all responses – Definitely agree with this one. This is identified in No More Mr. Nice Guy as the major culprit for men lacking confidence and abilities with women. I think it probably has wider implications than that as well.
8. Over-usage of Porn / Bad Sex / Worship of Sex / Not Getting Enough Sex – 5% of all responses – I think this is more of a symptom of some of the issues pointed out above, and not a root cause itself. Although I do have a big post on porn I’ve been meaning to do for a while.
All very interesting, and very helpful. Tomorrow I’ll be doing a more in-depth “State of The Site” post, where we’ll discuss a lot of the feedback and suggestions you all made for the site, as well as some changes down the pipeline in the coming months.