Hey Jack Sparrow -
Props to you for recognizing the hypocrisy....that self awareness will take you far.
One thing I noticed - here is part of a post you made in another thread....
(05-11-2012 03:50 AM)Jack Sparrow Wrote: Honestly, with some girls I just want to bang them hard, hear her scream and wake up her roommate, them just blow a load on her face. While many girls I enjoy talking to until late night, then make out, have sex. I am sure there is some unresolved pathology within me that make me want to F the shit out of some girls hard. But at this point I really don't care because it is not all consuming and destroying my life or the lives of the girls.
For guys who always want to bang the crap out of girls, humiliate them, etc. That kind of behavior will get them in trouble. But if it's just an occasional urge with certain types of girls, I think it's alright.
I think I'll shoot for 95% Zan. I just think it'll serve me good. But if once in a while I have the urge to just "bang" a bitch hard and kick her out, I am not gonna be too hard on myself for that.
If I were to take your last post in this thread ("I know I still don't project enough sexuality. She probably still thinks of me as a friend")
about HB Ballerina and put it next to the one I just quoted and I took out your name, I think most people would think it was posted by two very different guys. I know that I literally had to go back and double check because I thought I had confused two different posters.
The problem is that your thoughts and actions are not congruent. I think another thread somewhere you talked about having difficulty resisting the urge to brag to your friends about how many girls you banged this year, yet when you're in front of HB Ballerina you behave like a fearful nice guy.
It seems to me you have these extremes and you have yet to learn how to bring them into balance. It's like you yo-yo between trying to be this asshole/player who would like to cum on a woman's face and brag about it to his friends and then in the next breath try to connect with a girl emotionally.
If you want to fuck a woman, then don't be ashamed to display that through your actions and behaviors. You don't know how to express your sexuality without shame and in an attractive way.
I think this is where Mark's book Models really is worth its weight in gold. When he talks about vulnerability, I still have yet to see any guy on here truly get what he is trying to teach. THIS is an example of what he means. You cannot have a part of your sexuality that you can post on a forum but then be ashamed to show a woman.
Just something I noticed that I thought you might want to think about a little bit.