The No-More-Porn Thread

[Marcus Aurelius]

Well, part of me was hoping that there would be the picture (there was) and not just a description of the scandal so I guess I'm not feeling too good about going where I knew there might be tits. I suppose it doesn't merit a reset.

[barney stintson]

(08-03-2012 04:39 PM)SeXyBaCk Wrote:  I see tits everyday for my work.

Wait wut?

What do you do and are there any current openings?

[QuittingTime]

Week three is over; today marks the beginning of week four.

I am still completely suffering over this. Plan to investigate more options for tackling this problem as I feel totally convinced that by the end of the challenge I will still be exactly as addicted as I was before and, without further moderation/goal setting, I will certainly go back.

To any newbies reading this, I do want to make sure to point out that my case is not the typical case on this thread. While most people are attempting this challenge in order to increase their success in having sex with women, I am doing it because I am addicted to porn and sex in general, but am morally uninterested in doing either. So my /drive/ to PMO or any related activity is not something that is misdirected in my life (that is, needs to be turned towards women) but something that is equally if not more dangerous to my sense of wellbeing when it IS turned towards women (because I am essentially incapable of respecting them in the wash of my urges). By my own personal philosophy, this makes sex with women a virtual impossibility until I sort out the depths of this problem.

So yeah, I have some figuring to do and am going to try to contact some more in-depth addiction recovery services. Wish me luck. I will probably keep checking in here, though.

Onward.

-Q

[MaidenPriest]

Well.. well well amigos ! Those who are in the process, I just want to congratulate you guys for your determination !
Keep going !
I have become a big fan of Mark and read his article today.
Well, I realized how addicted I am to porn, I just cannot get aroused without it.
I have also decided to join this movement and though I have not set any goal on my masturbation routine . Well, I can definitely pledge to not watch porn and will try to control my masturbation as much as possible.
I definitely want to get my old self back, who used to appreciate and get excited with finer things in a woman !!
Will be visiting this place quite often !

[Happenstance]

Approaching day 19,

Haven't looked at any porn nor masturbated since I started the challenge. Today I was definitely feeling more aroused than usual when around or seeing women in public. I'm hoping that this is the start of something good because in the first two and a half weeks I haven't noticed any significant changes in my sex drive.

I'll keep you all posted

[Gallo]

I'm in!
Day 1 starting now, no porn for 60 days. (I'm counting on masturbating once a week though
Let's see what happens!

[Solefald]

Hi guys! I'm joining you for the 60 day of no porn!

I have been regularly watching porn for 12-13 years since I was 13-14 years old. I have had some times off it, especially in the beginning relationships.

In my previous relationship that lasted for two years, my GF was covertly abusive, and I didn't realize that until I was almost completely destroyed. Before her I could last as long as I wanted, I was dominant, and sexual. With her I become a sexually frustrated and ashamed guy. I started watching porn to get a release for my frustration, and it just made things endlessly much worse.

A couple weeks ago I managed almost three weeks without, then I watched season 4 and 5 of Californication, and suddenly I was watching porn again. I think I have to completely stay away from watching hot women on pictures, and tv for a little while, as it immediately starts luring me back to porn.

Game on!

[EvoNow]

Well, I hooked up with the freaky girl on Saturday night. Needed to have an orgasm, was dying, but didn't want to MO. We did do some freaky stuff and QuittingTime was right, it did re-trigger my porn circuits a bit (also caught myself doing the nipple thing during a BJ, oops), but I am holding strong.

Last night a flyer for porn vids came to me in my REAL mailbox! I don't know how they found my address... and somehow even though this company doesn't normally sell freaky vids... they had some in their catalog this time for the first time ever! I realize I shoulda just tossed it without opening it, I don't know why I checked... but I have to say, it's giving me a TRUE test today as I was SO tempted to go online and order those vids, but I won't. I CAN DO THIS! Venting here helps, so thanks to anyone reading.

I can definitely see now what the guys mean about needing a "chaser" after having a real orgasm with a girl because yesterday and today I've been going CRAZY...thinking of any and all girls I could hook up with this week!

I am going to chill though and focus my energy on working out and meeting new girls. Pursuing girls I'm not interested in just because I want to hook up is also something I am trying to get away from with this...I feel wasting time with those girls is almost as bad as wasting time on porno.

Moving onward. Today is Day #14 of NoFap. Wow I made it 2 weeks! Today at the coffee shop I was feeling superaggressive and into "regular" girls like many guys have reported. which was nice. Now if I could stop thinking of the freaky stuff...soon...

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Gallo and Solefald, welcome. LET'S DO THIS!

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Gallo and Solefald, welcome. LET'S DO THIS!

[EricR]

#20 now. The first 10 days were (almost) too easy, the following were much harder. On #16 I had the first wet dream since I started this; it was not porn-related. I dreamed of making love to an ex-coworker I had asked out (Alas, unsuccesfully, like all my attempts to get a partner) some years ago.

I live and work in a big city and get insanely attracted to most young (and not-so-young) women I see on the streets and in the metro, and I'm talking about 20-30 women DAILY; however, my social anxiety still prevents me from making any move.

I was able to keep by body and mind busy with my exercising and language-learning routines and this helped a lot. I'm glad to post this positive report; didn't thought I'd last that long and really want to keep going and get a conclusive answer about the benefits of quitting PMO. Best of luck and see y'all in 10 days.

Regards,
Eric.

[EvoNow]

I'm fucking DYING right now. Chaser Effect in FULL effect. I think this would have been easier if I had said NO hooking up at all! ugh

[QuittingTime]

Evo,

It sounds like you're really struggling and it is good that you are reaching out for help. We are here to support you.

The fact of the matter is, you probably would have been better off without hooking up at all. I couldn't have told you that conclusively before hand, but now that you have done it, empirical evidence is showing you the usefulness of random hookups. In my own personal worldview, a random hookup usually isn't really any different from masturbating - it's just masturbation that happens to involve someone else. I don't think it really becomes something different until there is a deliberate romantic/emotional connection being worked on at the same time. I only offer this consideration because it might help you to stay away from random hookups during your detox; think of them as another form of MO and it should increase your motivation to refrain.

As for me, I am on day 25 of no porn, no masturbation, and doing my best for no fantasy. I keep catching myself about 1 or 2 minutes in, but usually whenever I catch myself I am able to say "No, we're not doing this," and focus on something else, so I don't want to reset my counter. I consider these my acceptable "small slip-ups". If I get stuck in something really awful I may reconsider, but that's part of the problem - these fantasies get you stuck; most of the time I don't even realize I'm making a mistake until the fantasy is well underway. So it's hard to know what to classify as actually a slip-up, and what to classify as my brain getting the better of me.

I am pretty much suffering from this at every single moment I am not totally distracted with something else. I think my addiction may be pretty severe, and as a result I have signed up for an additional program of self-improvement with recoverynation.com. Their program is pretty unique in that it focuses primarily on helping you to become the person you want to be (presumably a person with no addictions!), and essentially force the addiction out of you by process of elimination; if there is no room in your concept of self for being addicted, you can't stay addicted.

Obviously not everyone here is doing this because they are addicted, but for those that are, I suggest checking it out as a useful compliment to this site.

Alright, everyone. We continue onward.

-Q

[Traindom]

I've had a few relapses in the past five weeks. Two were just masturbation, but the other two involved past freaky stuff. I successfully nullified the webcam issue. I will have to watch myself with the other. It involves mirrors and, well, I can't smash up all the mirrors in my house.

I have learnt from my relapses, though. I know I shouldn't take off my shirt and look at how I am progressing with my body composition goals too much. I also know I shouldn't look at my penis too much either. Crap escalates so furiously. I was taken by surprise.

I was worried that I had lost all my progress, but I was relieved when I read Mark's experiences. He talked about dipping into porn a couple of times in the span of three weeks. He said that the benefits of the reboot were unaffected. So I was relieved to hear this.

I also had little to no desire to relapse for a second time after I would relapse. I always made it a point to not relapse twice in one day. The first relapse is no justification for another like it was before.

I'm happy that even after relapsing or touching my penis, I am able to say no. It's a sign of progress to me.

As for the benefits, I feel they are present and unaffected. Sexual desire is going strong. I'm able to appreciate hints of beauty in women, which is an awesome effect of my lack of numbness as well. While I may have relapsed, it never was with porn. So the beauty effect is definitely untouched.

I feel more lively these days. While porn was a treat for me in the past, this feeling trumps it all. And I know I should redirect my attention to real women, which will provide me with more of an enriching feeling. This is something I will be committed to for the rest of my life.

I hope you guys get to feel this feeling. Don't give up. It's worth it. Everytime you say no, you're that much closer to it. And if you slip up, have the power to say "no" to another one. QuittingTime, I think that you're still progressing if you're able to recognize that you're in the middle of a situation and then say "no" to it. I think you're on the right track. I think that as long as you're committed to this, your results will get better and better. Use the fact that it bothers you to power your true intentions. Good luck.

[Marcus Aurelius]

Two weeks and feeling strong! My girlfriend is coming up to visit next weekend. It will have been just under two months ago that we saw each other last. The LDR is worth it though!

Stay strong gents.

[QuittingTime]

Congrats Marcus. Hope things keep on well with you two.

-Q

[QuittingTime]

I just added all my old "cyber hookup" websites as well as AIM (which is crawling with triggers and contacts and virtually nothing else) to my blocker's "black list," meaning I can't ever go to those sites again. I realized that the possibility of going back to them was making things harder to deal with and I am hoping that this additional determination will put a damper on some of the insistent "but you still could!" voices in my head. By my logic, if I actually CAN'T, then they will have to shut up a little.

Approaching day 27. Gurgh.

-Q

[WittyAngels]

Day #1, not so hard as I have been consciously trying to cut back, we'll see how this progresses.

[sykilik101]

Day 10. I've been feeling some of the productive/seeing the real beauty in women benefits, but I'm still incessantly having that desire to rub one out in the back of my mind. Nothing too bad for the most part, however.

Side note: Has anyone else been feeling pain as a symptom? For some reason, my left ball has been aching, as well as my side, also on the left. I dunno if it's related, but I figured I'd ask someone.

[QuittingTime]

Sykilik,

Yes, I think pain can definitely be expected in more extreme cases. That being said, you should definitely check with a doctor if it keeps up; personally I would give it a few days and see how it develops. And not to be a downer or an alarmist, but it never hurts to check yourself for lumps. All that being said, my guess is that it's probably your body reacting to the new regimen and that it will work itself out if you just stick with it.

Best of luck.
-Q

[BudCrow]

I have to say I'm extremely tempted right now to watch some porn.

I've been finding it harder the last week (week 7)

Infact I looked at a some screens of a porno-does that mean I've cheated? Do I need to reset?

[Marcus Aurelius]

Day 17

The first 1.5 weeks or so I had the itch really bad but now I'm glad to say it's subsided though I remain on guard. Even the random, non-porn related boners have decreased.

I have started to appreciate the "Plain Janes" more though.

[BudCrow]

(08-12-2012 11:05 PM)BudCrow Wrote:  I have to say I'm extremely tempted right now to watch some porn.

I've been finding it harder the last week (week 7)

Infact I looked at a some screens of a porno-does that mean I've cheated? Do I need to reset?

mkay so I did break. I happened to find one of my favorite pornos in HD, so I downloaded it.

I though I'd feel like shit, but I don't.

There is still a HUGE difference in watching a scene vs streaming for several hours through thousands of videos.

Reset today. I don't think I could do no fap for 60 days, but I'm gonna see how long I can go this time around.

[Jay]

I had some relapses over the weekend. A bit of porn after a night out of striking out and coming home drunk. This is really freaking hard to do! I'm going to reset the clock on my no porn, no masturbation kick to today, Aug 13. I really need to cut down on aimless computer usage. That is the biggest issue for me (especially at night when drinking!)

[barney stintson]

been a little over 30 days straight.

get off my emotional center occasionally. overall though confidence increased.

[EvoNow]

I kind of cracked last Wednesday...posted an ad and had a girl come over for a bj/rj (for some reason I don't like to have penetration sex with $$ girls). After she left I texted her and had her come back again! Figuring if I didn't bust again that night I'd have major chaser effect, and I was right, it helped and I wasn't super horny again until today.

I'm still a little bummed that I went back to the ads though, even if it was for something a little more regular. The rimjob thing is grey area for me because I do have pretty strong fantasies about that and have watched that type of porn in addition to the super freaky stuff. The goal of this reboot is to make p-in-v sex my #1 fantasy!

I have to say that it feels like it's getting there though...it's all I can think about today! I thought I had a girl coming into town who ONLY does p-in-v which would have been amazing but she flaked. Now I got nothing, but it will be a good test as I haven't REALLY tested yet due to those 2 hookups.

None the less, this is Day #20 of No Fap/No porn and I'm happy to be here

[EvoNow]

Last night had an amazing experience - ended up sleeping with a ridiculously hot girl and had a few issues getting it up at first, but soon went strong and proceeded to do her for a good 20-30 min, when at the end I actually had an orgasm! This is a big deal for me as probably from the years of PMO I very rarely bust during actual sex, and if I do it's usually very quickly during morning sex. Last night I chose when I wanted to cum, and did. I was also a bit drunk which makes this even more of a milestone for me (much harder for me to cum when drunk). The O was incredible as well. Should be seeing her again tonight