The I-statement is a great comfort building tool

[Brian]

I have a habit of going through this process when i hit on a girl. Whie it is somewhat effective, i believe that a little modification on it will make it more effective.

Basically, I approach the girl by stating my interest, then tease, then start finding out more about her to connect. However, sometime i drift off into talking about facts. Such as talking endlessly about spirituality, music, pop culture etc. These facts are, while interesting, it doesnt necessary generate more attraction or getting me and the girl feeling more connected in anyway. It's not bad but it's not a positive either. Basically, it's very neutral. Have i get girls in the past talking like this? Sure, but the girl already like me anyway.

However, i believe i can be more connected(or not) with a girl by putting in more "I-statement". So basically, whenever a girl talk about certain things, i can state how "I personally" felt about it or my personal experience about it.

girl: this concert have exellent music
me: I agree. I always like trance music and have been a fan ever since my first rave 5 years ago. Whenever i listen to trance, i felt happy and content by it.

girl: I love hiphop.
me: I hate hiphop with passion. I felt the music sounded like noises to me.

Obviously the above comments are very polarizing...both negative and positive. Naturally of course the first one would bring more connection toward a girl while the second one will most likely push the girl away. However, I believe you should be honest with the girl about how you truly felt about certain topic. Its' beyond needy as shit if I dislike hiphop and then tell the girl i like it. She can easily sense my dishonesty and be super turn off by it. Not to mention in the long run, it will make me super needy around women. Sometime polarizing negatively with a woman using i-statement will one, get her to respect you and two make you less needy(builds innergame regardless if you get the girl or not). Either way, it's a win/win for you. The girl isnt going to remember any facts you tell her the next day, however, she's going to remember who you are and what you stand for.