Should I wish the girl who dumped me a month ago happy birthday?

[Creatine Dreams]

My gut says no.

But I always appreciate hearing other people's perspectives!

[Tim]

Dude... Do what you want. Do you actually feel like you want to wish her a happy birthday?

[playmaker001]

NO! she dumped you dude....if you dumped her it'd be a different story. You shouldn't even remember when her B-day is after a thing like this. Forget about her.

[SeXyBaCk]

Yeah i mean if you remember per chance looking at your diary, send an email or something. But you shouldn't be racking your brains, so for the sake of your own wellbeing, no, forget about it.

Also don't date taurus', they suck. I only once dated a taurus, she was this crazy honduran girl. Yes, this is tongue in cheek.

If you send a message she'll probably answer, can you handle that? And if she just ignores it can you handle that? Too many ? my thinks. Answering none of which will make your day.

[Chaos]

Creatine... still with that girl?

Here's what your words say:

Quote:Should I wish the girl who dumped me a month ago happy birthday?

but here's what you actually want to ask:

Quote:What would provide me with the best opportunity to get her back?

You're still trying to get her back and you're wondering what would be your "best move" ... you're thinking something like "I shouldn't call her, then she'll start wondering how is it I didn't wish her happy birthday and she'll call and then I'll game her back to me ... but then again that hasn't been working this past two months so maybe if I play the nice guy, then maybe, she'll let me back in her life... but then again being the nice guy is a bad thing and never works and ..."

I've been there. There's no right move, no move will bring her back and you better accept it sooner than later because what actually prevents you from getting her (or other girls) is the neediness behind that. In fact, any of the options is ok... if you didn't really care or had subtle intentions...

EDIT: BTW, despite the harsh words, I know it's a difficult process... but you have to go through it, preferably by cutting all contact with her. Your situation will always hurt, there's no "improvement" that will allow you to avoid that pain, but the pain will grow shorter and you'll learn to throw it away faster and move on with your life... Right now you're at the point where it hurts a lot and feels like a really difficult task, but it is a task you'll have to face sooner rather than later and grow from it...

[baller08]

Chaos terrific post. Playmaker's attitude is one you need to adopt right now Creatine.

Tim you can't ask a man in Creatine's situation that question. What he wants isn't good for him. See Chaos' post. This is the type of appropriate advice and insight we need here more.

[Creatine Dreams]

Not wishing her a happy birthday.

At this point, I just don't see anything good coming out it. Even if she did want to magically get together with me, it would never be the same, because I know longer associate the good times I originally has with her. Now, I just associate with her the rejection and hurt I felt when she lost interest in me and subsequently rejected me. I am still getting over her, but it is getting better. I have good days and bad days. And this too, shall pass.

On another note, I think that flawed people often attract each other. We both seem to have an extreme need for external validation. And once she got it from me, she was gone. I can let her repeat that pattern with someone else. But I need to change. And the change will come slowly, but it will happen. And the best thing I can do is continue not to contact her.

[baller08]

Quote:On another note, I think that flawed people often attract each other. We both seem to have an extreme need for external validation. And once she got it from me, she was gone. I can let her repeat that pattern with someone else. But I need to change. And the change will come slowly, but it will happen. And the best thing I can do is continue not to contact her.

Excellent. This paragraph is all that matters. All that "if she magically will be or won't be" and "can no longer think of her in association with good times" is a complete waste of mental and emotional energy. Once again....do...not...give....a fuck...about anything concerning her.

[Creatine Dreams]

And I didn't. Life goes on.

[Arikado]

If you wanna, sure. But don't expect anything from it.

[Mark]

No. Go find another girl with the same birthday and wish her a happy birthday instead.

[baller08]

LOL! I'm going to steal that one Mark the next time a guy asks me something like this....because it happens often.

[machismo307]

let me tell you something, your gut is 99% right, true fact, humans are hard wired with instincts and guts are one of them , dont wish her, especially not if she dumped you for another dude, if she didnt dump you for another dude, then maybe depending on whether or not she said harsh shit in the breakup scene

[don]

I wish everyone i know a happy birthday if it occurs to me, who gives a shit, life's too short to worry about if you should wish somebody happy birthday!