Set a date with a girl, but she flaked! >:(

[Creatine Dreams]

Hey, guys I set a date with a girl off of OKCupid.

We had exchanged a couple of messages and last Friday, she asked me if I would like to get a drink.

I missed her message and said we should plan something for next week.
She said she was open and I said cool how bout Wednesday? She said sure.

I suggested we go to a rooftop bar in downtown LA for a drink.

She texted me back, That place looks fancy are jeans ok?

I said, "You should be fine. But if they act lame and try and bar you, there are other places."

She did not respond to that text which was on Tuesday and on Wednesday, she said that she was stuck at work and could not make it out.

I said "no worries. let's figure out something for the weekend if you are free."

She did not respond back.

Today, I texted her that I was going to a brewery with some friends but that we should get drinks afterwards. She has not yet responded but that is fine because it has only been a half hour or so.

My question is, did I do anything wrong? I do not think that I did, but if anyone else thinks I did, feel free to respond!

[Jani]

No, nothing wrong with it.
Text messages are rarely the cause of flaken.
If you liked the girl send another text in a few days.

[Creatine Dreams]

Anyways, I went on a date with that girl tonight. Did not get the sexual vibe from her and I did not really want to bone her.

I simply did not feel chemistry and that is fine.

She was off the internet and although she was pretty, she was bigger than what I like.

At the end of the night, we had a brief conversation on how we both were not sexually interested in each other.

Although I wanted her to be sexually interested in me, solely for my ego, I was very happy that she was honest with me that she did not want to have a romantic relationship with me.

And I was honest with her and told her I would probably make out with her but that I did not feel a sexual vibe.

We may hang out in the future, but solely as friends and that is fine.

[IdEngager]

Girls are flaky. People in LA are flaky (including me, not absconding myself here). Girls you meet off the internet are flaky. So you beat the odds by just hanging with her!

It's good you got over it and moved on. At least you can move onto better things now!

[Creatine Dreams]

Yeah, it was an internet date.

Those are hit and miss.

Took her to Baja Cantina for some drinks.

Would not have minded getting a blowjob but honestly, I saw very little future with her!

She was cool, but not hot enough for me based on past experiences.

Gonna have to keep on looking but oh well...

[Thor]

Creatine I am not the most experienced guy on the forum but for me I am open to dating all kinds of women. Every interaction I have I learn alittle more about women which will prepare me for encounters in the future.

[machismo307]

online dates can be fed up

[Creatine Dreams]

Yeah, dates from girls you meet in real life are better.

[Zelazny]

Someone once told me that internet dating was the "bottom of the barrel."

Not quite sure if that is just a bias, but so far, I've had surprising few succesful interactions with women I met on internet dating. And the female friends I have are also pretty much fed up with online dating. Over here in the netherlands there used to be a dating site that had this novel formula : You get random pairings (on some AI algorithm they showed me later, pretty fancy stuff with very interesting correlations*) with blurred pictures and as soon as you chat enough, the pictures slowly deblur, making you both invest in getting to know the other before you get to see the other. Led to interesting conversations.

And with the site being new, there was much more fun. People chatting for the sake of chatting with randomly paired opposite-sex-persons, basically flirting. Nowadays, the age categories shifted from around 20 to around 30 and it has become a meat-market of low-investing, hardly talking people whom screen out partners according to their list instead of getting to know eachother.

I understand that it's normal to withhold investment untill you've ascertained that the other side will invest too. But the minimal amount of investment I've seen there lately gives me the feeling that I'm not being related to as a human but as a potential option on a checklist.



* One funny correlation they found was the level of agreeableness of the man. If the man had a high drive to succeed (High potential, high need to achieve, high professionalism) women preferred men to be more agreeable, that is, smile and laugh more. If the men had lower status and/or drive, a lot of smiling and laughing was detrimental to the rating of men.