Questions on women
So as time passes by, I start to wonder if I can improve, or how much I should worry about it. I had some questions.
1. Do you really have to be Mr. Smoothman all the time? When I've read "examples" of people, it sometimes sounds way too movie-like and perfect for the situation. Does this even make a difference? I mean, there's some clever and funny stuff I've said, but it's definitely not all the time. I don't necessarily have a plan to extract information out of someone, or make some slick transition, it just sort of happens, or I'll just ask them/do it directly.
2. How does the first 5 minutes of conversation go with other people here? I find that mostly, it's a little shaky, the responses are somewhat limited, me being teasy doesn't work as well, it's kind of just meh. It doesn't start getting fun/interesting until there's...something, not sure how to put it. Value maybe? Emotions? I found out about cold reads recently, and tried it out a couple of times, but it was awkward in the beginning of the conversation, seemed to break the flow. But in an actually hooked conversation, it's fine. Also another question, how long should you stick around until you've decided that there's no pushing things forward? Some people take different amounts of time to warm up. Or is the answer just start pushing really fast until she says stop.
3. Do you really have to be physically/logistically leading all the time? As in, setting up where to eat, what movie to watch, etc? Like, does it really kill the mood if you just ask what they're in the mood for and make a decision off of that, not just because you want them to like it, but because you want some mystery added as well and just to try something new? Or am I thinking about this in the wrong way, like the decision to give her the choice to her IS a leading thing (like "I could eat anything, where do you usually go to eat? Let's go there"). I feel like, with anything (conversation, what to do), there should be some mutual back and forth happening, otherwise I could be interacting with a piece of cement and go through the same motions. Where is the boundary between domineering, dominating, and just mutuality?
4. Where is the boundary of being likable and being yourself? As in, if some guy is pretty cool, except he's totally racist, if he just stopped hating other people he'd be cooler. Or if some guy was generally alright, except he always keeps repeating the same joke he makes and laughs for too long, he'd be a tolerable person if he didn't do that. Or even less extreme, if someone's just generally cool, but looks down on tastes of other people, it makes him less cool.
However, if you mold yourself too much in the image of other people, you'll never really be "you". This doesn't mean that someone shouldn't ever change thoughts or think openly though. And sure, by being extremely racist, you'll attract the extremely racist girls more, but by removing that from your personality, you'll have a wider variety. So where does the boundary lie?