I have women in my life. What now?

[Jean DeCuir]

Hello!
Quick presentation, I'm 19 years old, from Portugal, studying psychology on college ( no, i can't solve all your problems in under 5 minutes or anywhere )

I'm in a bit of a rush, so i'll try to be direct here:

I'm into this pick up scene for about some time but only started closing consistently a few months ago. I'm currently dating 2 women. They are colored friends and i haven't got laid with any of them yet. The problem is that they are not investing on me like i feel they should.

So one of them is this 21 years old italian foreign student. I don't care much about her to be honest.
The other one is this 18 year old cutie from med school. She's girlfriend material.

So, i kissed closed the italian the night i met her. Every since had 2 dates with her. Been in her home for twice and she gave me last minute resistance for both of them, tho i believe she did it because the first time her room mate was there and the second time she gave me last minute resistance i was miscalibrated because i was drunk as hell. This last time happent last saturday, every since she gave me only one call because of something circusntancial. She's not investing but i don't care much.

The second girl i took her phone number on the night i met her, managed to kiss close 2 weeks after that, on our first date. Every since i've been to her house once and she gave me last minute resistance. Since then she just became progressively cold. She won't call me or text me. I'm always the one that texts first or calls, even tho i do it with days of break. She rejected my 2 last dates invatitions because she says she's busy with her finals (We have finals in January).

My question is: What the heck is wrong with these women? Aren't they attracted to me? I've been to her houses so it's very unlikely. The med school girl, the one i care most, tells me to call her next week because she's going to be free by then, but still, or i'm just being too needy or they are going cold ( i kinda feel it), since they don't start a texting with me and all...

Does anyone went throug this before?

P.S: I'll be out to visit my grandparents, ironaclly med school girl lives on the same street. I called her this morning and she said she's going to be busy but i think i'm going to show up anyway... no woman tells me no, she knows she wants me
P.S.: I'll also be browsing to this website with my cell phone, so feel free to answer me in the next hours. Tell me everything you think you should.

Thanks a lot guys. I'm regestering to this forum since post masculine has the best relationship advise posts, don't let me down.

[SeXyBaCk]

To be frank, yes, you're being needy. Call her after her exams. Go out with your friends in the meanwhile or hang out with other women. If you push too much now she will be turned off.

[FirstAidKit]

Dude, you are not dating these women. You have had a couple of dates with them, and neither sound that enthused about continuing it. Also, showing up at a girl's house when she's told you she is busy is creepy and will massively put her off. Point is, people who like you will act like they like you. They will make the time to see you, text you, call you, whatever.

I'd let it be. Go see your friends and do other things. If you have trouble not texting delete their numbers so you are not tempted. Go meet some chicks who are excited to hang out with you.

[Trickster]

Jean DeCuir Wrote:P.S: I'll be out to visit my grandparents, ironaclly med school girl lives on the same street. I called her this morning and she said she's going to be busy but i think i'm going to show up anyway... no woman tells me no, she knows she wants me

Um, don't do this. This is stalkerish and I guarantee you that she'll respond poorly. As for the rest of your post, honestly, it sounds like you went out with these girls and they're not that into you which is why they keep blowing you off.

[Jean DeCuir]

I didn't show up, i didn't feel like i should. But trust me, don't believe every stuff you read on e-books until you're actually calibrated enough to truly understand it.

" On a scale of 0 to 10, how much do you want to kiss me right now?"
" 0..."
And i kissed her anyway ( in this case, it was the italian girl) my point: Screw what they say!

Now as for the med school girl, yes i'm dating her. I've been to her house, she even cooked to me... and since our sex life doesn't exist we would only have to buy a countryside farm to actually have a marriage lifestyle lol.

My guess is that she's giving me that old Anti-Slut defense and it makes all the sense. She kisses me without toungue. We met in a bar ( wich is not usual from this side of the ocean) and she actually texted me for 2 weeks wich makes her look desperate. When i call her she always tells me to text her or call her again at the end of our long conversations, wich means she wants me to do it but she won't start it... why? because she's under an ASD spell, wich i'll break no matter what... And her finals, that's a big deal too. I saw her studying and she literally studyed more for 2 exams then i did in my whole life ( yes, i'm serious :O)
She told me to schedualle a date next week. That's what i'm going to do. I'll text her today, let her get cold for the weekend and then schedualel it for tuesday or so... Also, maybe she'll like to see the pic of me with the italian girl on her bathroom ( me kissing her on the cheek) so she can be a little "wise" (jealous)

[Mark]

She's giving you anti-slut defense? Wait, I thought we weren't supposed to believe what we read in e-books?

[Matty]

you know....I fuckin really struggle with this too, so i'm not one to talk, but you really should stop overthinking it. My brain hurts just reading this. Also, you should really pay attention to the terminology you're thinking about these woman in. There's a great video floating around youtube of a guy who spoke at one of David DeAngelo's later events (I can't remember who it is). He talks about the effect that thinking about woman with terms like "anti-slut defence", "last-minute resistance", "calibration" and other PUA, pseudo-war terminology has on guys psyche. It may seem harmless enough, but repetitively thinking of your dating life with these terms does effect how you view the world in the long run.

[Mark]

Alex Allman's speech at the Man Transformation event. Great speech. And a great guy.

And not only are you over-thinking this stuff Jean (a major sign of neediness), but you're deluding yourself and just believing what you want to believe. Basically every reply on this board came out and say the same thing (that these girls aren't that into you and you're getting strung along), and you chose to ignore it and interpret this girl's actions in a different way.

If you're not going to listen to the feedback people give you around here, then people will stop trying to help you.

With that said, I agree with them. This girl is stringing you along. And no, you're not "dating" unless you've had sex with her. Playing house and getting kisses from her like you do from your grandma do not constitute "dating." Sounds like this girl likes the attention, the companionship, but is not attracted enough to you to sleep with you. I would drop her and move on.

[Trickster]

Jean DeCuir Wrote:I'll text her today, let her get cold for the weekend and then schedualel it for tuesday or so... Also, maybe she'll like to see the pic of me with the italian girl on her bathroom ( me kissing her on the cheek) so she can be a little "wise" (jealous)

Any sane woman would see that and think that you're a jackass.

[Jean DeCuir]

Damn, guys!

You are totally right! Thanks for this "wake up slap". I needed it.

matty, you're right i'm overthinking it and i didn't even noticed it. That's a neediness sign like Mark told me. And the true is that i'm not dating her either since i didn't have sex with her yet. I tought this girl was really girlfriend material and i should just get on her pants as soon as possible, but the true is that i haven't even been on her bed! Jesus! The heck is wrong with me? I guess it's sexual bias and Mystery bias...

Well, since last week she told me the only time she would be sure she could see me again is 31st January, and since last time i saw her i punished her for not having sex with me resulting in her texting me saying " i promise i'll compensate you next time" (sexually) i guess i'll drop her defintely by the end of next week if i can't manage to have sex with her. There's an old saying here " got on your knees then you'll have to pray" and i'm also know for my perseverance so i don't really lose anything in giving it a last try.

meanwhile i'm going to pick up women tommorow night. Trcikster, i wanted to say i was going to post the pic on facebook, not deliberatly text the pic to her. My bad.