How can I improve my verbal game?

[DTF]

That seems to be my biggest problem when it comes to picking up girls. So my question is, where can I learn how to be more interesting, more funny, more calibrated, knowing the right things to say at the right time, knowing what to say when the conversation runs dry, and so on, so that I am more attractive to the women I meet throughout my life, whether I just met them somewhere or they were introduced to me by a mutual friend?

[bwong]

I think you are asking the wrong question. You should be asking yourself what makes you interesting and unique. If all you do is sit at home and play video games and watch porn, learning what to say at the right time wont help you out. If you dont have any life experience go out and get some. It can be traveling, learning a new language or meeting new people who are interesting. Once you do that learn how to share your experience and stories with others. Make sure its genuine, true, and yours. Having a conversation with anyone is about building a rapport and a connection. In terms of attracting the opposite sex you have to keep it light and fun.

As for learning where you can read more material, I would highly recommend Mark's Models e book.

[Jon]

Where can you learn as in what books or where can you learn as in what should you go out and try?

[Oli]

I'd say knowing a bunch of key concepts like: statements, being more specific, call-back humor, misinterpretation, eliminating filler words ("um"), jump-off points, misdirection, etc. and working through each concept month by month is a good way to go.

On a related note, just saw Zack Bauer's video from the 21 Convention. He lays out a REALLY simple way for a conversation/pick up to go down. Just a simple model packaged that can be easily remembered.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEhRSm9aXpo

[Todd1]

First I would say your probably over thinking the idea of "verbal game". Read Mark's older posts about picking up women in other countries. Some of the girls he picked up didn't speak the same language. A lot of your success will be determined not by what you say but how you say it, body language, eye contact,...

If you are still looking for things to help in this area I would look into tapes of DJ Fiji at the 21 convention, he gives a few good drills. Mark's old G3 program also covered this area in depth, I expect that the upcoming program would likely do the same.

[DTF]

bwong Wrote:I think you are asking the wrong question. You should be asking yourself what makes you interesting and unique. If all you do is sit at home and play video games and watch porn, learning what to say at the right time wont help you out. If you dont have any life experience go out and get some. It can be traveling, learning a new language or meeting new people who are interesting. Once you do that learn how to share your experience and stories with others. Make sure its genuine, true, and yours. Having a conversation with anyone is about building a rapport and a connection. In terms of attracting the opposite sex you have to keep it light and fun.

As for learning where you can read more material, I would highly recommend Mark's Models e book.

This is my main problem right here. How can I keep it light and fun with a girl so that she is attracted to me? Sharing experiences and stories with her isn't going to necessarily get me laid.

Jon Wrote:Where can you learn as in what books or where can you learn as in what should you go out and try?

The latter

gabe Wrote:I'd say knowing a bunch of key concepts like: statements, being more specific, call-back humor, misinterpretation, eliminating filler words ("um"), jump-off points, misdirection, etc. and working through each concept month by month is a good way to go.

On a related note, just saw Zack Bauer's video from the 21 Convention. He lays out a REALLY simple way for a conversation/pick up to go down. Just a simple model packaged that can be easily remembered.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEhRSm9aXpo

Thank you.

Todd1 Wrote:First I would say your probably over thinking the idea of "verbal game". Read Mark's older posts about picking up women in other countries. Some of the girls he picked up didn't speak the same language. A lot of your success will be determined not by what you say but how you say it, body language, eye contact,...

If you are still looking for things to help in this area I would look into tapes of DJ Fiji at the 21 convention, he gives a few good drills. Mark's old G3 program also covered this area in depth, I expect that the upcoming program would likely do the same.

Yes, I know, but the language barrier thing, if anything, is an advantage. You can't talk to the girl, so you just communicate with her by expressing yourself through body language, eye contact, touching, etc. For American girls, at some point, I'm going to have to talk to her. And thanks for the drills.

Maybe I am overthinking it, but I rather overthink it, then not think at all and just give up.

[Oli]

Didn't want to start I knew thread, so I'll ask here. Does anyone know any good books on improving your conversation skills?

[Jon]

How to win friends and influence people?

[slowhands]

gabe Wrote:Didn't want to start I knew thread, so I'll ask here. Does anyone know any good books on improving your conversation skills?

Not a book but I've always heard good things about toastmasters...I haven't joined yet but am planning on it soon. Has anyone else had experience with toastmasters?

IMO, social skills can't be learned from a book. You have to actually do it. A book can give you a guideline or outline, but talking with someone is too dynamic and complex to try to squeeze into sometype of structure.

Example: I developed a better sense of humour and timing over the years by consistently cracking jokes.