How Do I Find Parties?

[Passion]

From what I've been hearing from Mark and others, college parties are the way to go. The only problem is I can never seem to find one nor am I ever invited to any. I've only been to three parties while in college (invited to all of them) and I'm a senior graduating in August. I want to at least go to some parties before I graduate. All I've been doing lately is going to local bars, and depending on the night, its either a hit or a miss (in terms of the turn out).

Anyone have any advice?

[TheImptuous]

How many friends you got and what are they like status-wise?

[Passion]

Basically, I have my roommates (about 5 besides me) and 3 other good friends living else where on campus (my other friends live off campus). The problem is that none of them ever seem to care about going out. One of my friends used to be in a frat and the other has been to frat parties before (never been to one myself).

There's actually a frat house nearby, but I'm not sure what you do to get in (if you can). Do I have to pay money? Do I need to bring girls?

Edit: BTW, before you ask, my roommates aren't really cool with throwing parties here. It's not an ideal place for parties anyway

[TheImptuous]

(03-25-2013 01:27 PM)Passion Wrote:  Basically, I have my roommates (about 5 besides me) and 3 other good friends living else where on campus (my other friends live off campus). The problem is that none of them ever seem to care about going out. One of my friends used to be in a frat and the other has been to frat parties before (never been to one myself).

There's actually a frat house nearby, but I'm not sure what you do to get in (if you can). Do I have to pay money? Do I need to bring girls?

Edit: BTW, before you ask, my roommates aren't really cool with throwing parties here. It's not an ideal place for parties anyway

If there's a reason for them to want you there they'll find an excuse to let you be there; that's how just about anything works. But if you don't know any of them and you have nothing to offer, why would they want you there?

Look: what is a party? It's a social occasion put together so that one's acquaintances can enjoy the things that happen when a group of people are put together in one place - fun, merriment, conversation, games, sex, etc. So a party has a certain value attached to it, and in order to share in that value you need to do one of three things, namely a) get invited (requires having non-introvert friends), b) know somebody who's attending and hope that gets you in, or c) crash it and be able to add value to the experience such that making you leave never enters into anyone's mind.

Anyway, if you have a frat house nearby, it's a perfect chance to experiment.

[Passion]

My one friend isn't in a frat anymore and he tends to be busy a lot (school work). The other one, I only went out with him once to find a party, but we ended up doing something else. Haven't really asked him anymore beyond that. I really got to set something up with my other friends. I'm sure they'd be interested.

I'll definitely look into the frat house. Just gotta figure out how to get there lol

[IdEngager]

Well, you're a senior in college, so you don't have much time, but you do at least live on campus so you're in the area, and you're pushing yourself to get out there.

First off, regarding frat parties, no you don't need to pay, but no you probably won't get in unless you bring girls or know someone in there anyway. You're a senior in college anyway, so that makes you what, 22? Why you bothering with frat parties at this point? I don't really have anything against frat guys, my college roommate of two years was a frat guy and was/is a great person (except for the fact that Dave Matthews was the ONLY thing he could play on guitar), but at your age, you'll probably find frat parties to be an excess of trying too hard. Maybe not. You should probably go to one at least once just to see how it's like, just know you probably won't get in unless you make a friend inside or roll up with like three girls.

Throwing parties at your own place is sort of a pain anyway, unless you have no living standards. I threw probably 2 or 3 big parties when I was in school, and there's always the constant fear of someone breaking shit or taking something. Or puking on your floor. But it is nice to be able to invite people back. At least keep some drinks for guests, maybe you can invite some people over prior to going out to pregame?

I played club sports (ultimate frisbee) during college, and that definitely increased the number of party opportunities hugely. There weren't a bunch of hot girls at frisbee parties or anything, but even if I went to a teammates place to have a few drinks and play poker, at least you're out and being social. At lot of times in college, I'd go out and start drinking in one place, and wander in the neighborhood finding other open house parties, or hear about other parties bumping into acquaintances.

Your primary goal regardless should probably be increasing your social network. It sounds like you just don't know that many people. Do you do anything extra curricular outside of class? Even if it isn't even party centric, you'll increase your opportunities (party-wise and otherwise) just by knowing more people.

[Jon]

(03-25-2013 04:44 PM)Passion Wrote:  My one friend isn't in a frat anymore and he tends to be busy a lot (school work). The other one, I only went out with him once to find a party, but we ended up doing something else. Haven't really asked him anymore beyond that. I really got to set something up with my other friends. I'm sure they'd be interested.

I'll definitely look into the frat house. Just gotta figure out how to get there lol

Ask your friend who used to be in a frat what a non-member needs to do to get to the party.

Also, try to make friends who want to do the same things as you. The best way to get to a lot of parties is to have a social circle where it's automatic.

[SeXyBaCk]

doesnt' your town/area have a website where all parties are listed? I mean organised parties obviously, not house parties, they come with entrance fee but you can't be picky at this point right?

Something along the lines of tillate? Here listed parties/events are in the newspaper every day, as well as local radio.

[Bounce]

(03-25-2013 04:59 PM)IdEngager Wrote:  Throwing parties at your own place is sort of a pain anyway, unless you have no living standards. I threw probably 2 or 3 big parties when I was in school, and there's always the constant fear of someone breaking shit or taking something. Or puking on your floor.

If you do throw your own party, maybe follow Mark & Jeremy from "Peep Show" & set up multiple puke points ^^
http://youtu.be/VyqJVcF5PeQ?t=2m57s

[Jon]

(03-25-2013 04:59 PM)IdEngager Wrote:  Throwing parties at your own place is sort of a pain anyway, unless you have no living standards. I threw probably 2 or 3 big parties when I was in school, and there's always the constant fear of someone breaking shit or taking something. Or puking on your floor. But it is nice to be able to invite people back. At least keep some drinks for guests, maybe you can invite some people over prior to going out to pregame?

Not to mention if you don't have a social circle that invites you to parties, you probably don't have a social circle to invite to parties.

[IdEngager]

(03-25-2013 07:34 PM)Bounce Wrote:  If you do throw your own party, maybe follow Mark & Jeremy from "Peep Show" & set up multiple puke points ^^
http://youtu.be/VyqJVcF5PeQ?t=2m57s

I actually threw a party two weeks ago and no one puked! We're almost adults now! One of my friends did pass out on my couch and left behind a trail of sequins and glitter. No I do not know Ke$ha.

[Cowboy]

Here is the deal:

Ideally, in an organic way, you would put yourself in the path of people - going to as many organizations as possible where you would naturally interact with others - so that you eventually develop bonds with people who know about parties / can invite you. However, you only have one semester, so you can do in the fast way.

1 - identify where the parties are. These include: words of mouth by friends, facebook events, or looking for a map of the frat houses, and the just walking around the area on a Friday or Saturday night and just listen where there is a party
2 - get into the parties. You might need several things. This depends on every occasion though. You might get in if: you bring a bunch of girls, you pay, or you jump the fence.
3 - Then just hit on girls

I have done every single option of steps 1 and 2 that I just mentioned. They work, and it's just a matter to figure out which out best fit the situation.

Notice that ideally you would use your social circle: friends would tell you about parties, friends would let you into the parties, and friends would introduce you to girls. But since you have a limited amount of time, a think this might work.

[jaysamuelli]

you need to use your social circle to get invited to parties- really no other way to find them than that. It might be a bit late to build the kind of social circle that will help you before you graduate. But, this is something to think about going forward (people still have parties after college!).