19 yr old virgin who think he has potential but no way to display it, how to overcome

[Reesays]

gonna make a long story very short here

moved around a bit with my family when I was little (country to country, city to city), didn't have a stable childhood, sheltered quite a bit by my parents

whenever I had the opportunity to make friends and did establish a friend circle or social circle, my family moved

age of 12, settled down in the bible belt, had a minor social life with some kids in my neighborhood until I turned 14 and then they got busy with their studies

Went to a small (not so good but decent) high school, total of around 250-300 kids. Most people stuck with their neighborhood cliques (it was also very inner city and urban culture type of high school). I did try to approach people and make friends but that often fell flat, kids were openly rude about hanging out with others so spent my first two years sitting alone. Final two years I ended up getting a clique together. Had high hopes for moving out for college, but due to a B average, bad guidance counseling, bad decisions by myself, and strict parenting which did not let me apply for scholarships (parents did not know the cost of college here in the US but basically said "oh whatever it is we can afford it", they ended up going back on their word), I ended up going to a university about 6 minutes from my house.

It is like, every day I think "man if I could have been raised here or had a stable childhood, my life relationships wise would have been so good". I also think "man, if I had gone to a bigger high school I would have had an easier time with my social life".

I am outgoing, social, make friends easily, have no issues dealing with most people, have good people skills, have a lot of things to talk about, and everything. Issues are:

1. My University is one of those colleges where everyone lives at home and goes right back home, no dorms.
2. Most people I am friends with live in another district, very hard to make friends with them as they are part time students who just work and study and try to go off elsewhere
3. A lot of the people on campus who have active social lives have them due to the high school they went to and mainly party with their high school buddies, they went to high school in a district about 5 miles away.

My solution?!

1. Spend more time at places like Starbucks or Barnes and Nobles to study
2. Get my sh*t together and transfer to a large university with kids my age group

PLAYAS! It is like I have all this potential, I can talk to people, I can get conversations started but it is just so darn hard to come across people my age group here and most people are just way too busy to even socialize or if they do socialize they do it with their high school friends. The friends I have made and added on facebook usually party with their high school buddies and when I have hinted that I wanna hang out they aren't that much for it. Plus we live really far away and everything. It drives me insane sometimes, I am trying but I keep falling flat. Most kids from my high school have given up and just thought about finishing college and building a social life after that.

[CHB2]

Yeah, transferring is probably your best bet. I went to a college with a really easy social life to break into, as everyone lived on campus and they did a a lot of freshman orientation activities that helped you meet people right off the bat. I would keep trying to find some people to hang out with where you are for the time being though, just be honest and tell them you don't know that many people and ask if it would be cool to join them in what they are doing.

I think it is important to consider college a social experience, in addition to an academic one. In fact I would probably suggest socializing as much as you can without it hurting your grades. Thats just my take on it though.

[Reesays]

I plan on doing it for my final three semesters, do you think that would be enough time for me to adjust and still have a social life especially at a big university?

[CHB2]

I knew people in college who only did their junior and senior year and they fit in just fine. At a big university you are bound to meet people you get along with simply by virtue of there being so many people. Just let people know you are a transfer student and I imagine they would be accepting. Also, I imagine there are many more clubs/activities than there are at your current school. I found joining intramural volleyball in college really helped me meet people, as did doing a yoga class, and the college radio station. Have you tried joining anything at your current school?

[Reesays]

I have but there isn't much. I did join the Film Club but except for two or three people, rest of the people there were kinda snobby in the sense that they would look at you when you talk to them and if you were not of their major, you would have a rough time. I mean I did make some friends though.

My luck in meeting people has been at Starbucks, Barnes and Nobles, and mainly places outside of school. Haven't had that much luck at school. No one is at the library on weekends and stuff and in classes most people are heading straight home.

ALSO, I plan on transferring for my final THREE SEMESTERS. That means HALF of my junior year and all of my senior year.

[CHB2]

I mean 3 semesters is better than none. Good luck with it and just try to keep your head up. I had moved a lot when I was younger, and it was never fun going to a new school and having to meet all new people. The positive is that once you meet a few people they will introduce you to their friends, and your social circle can multiply.

[Reesays]

ya I know, I mean here it is so exponentially hard, it really is